Im on plane again , and way going back to Taiwan
Well this time was different all after these two years I lost someone who I concern the most but she don't think that I'm concern her.. Well things just change too suddenly, I just wanna to Complain but end up with break up.. Seriously on that time I'm already think about what I want to do and how to far your mom but ... The things just change too suddenly and I have to force myself to accept I know everyone has their own limit on patient but.... Seriously I haven reach mind... I love you for two years but now end up with break up...when I'm in Malaysia you already know that I'm going to busy around and I just don't know why your mom was so cruel to treat you like this, and you still got no anger about it? Why? Why don't you fight for it just moment ...
But things has passed we have to look forward and keep climbing to the target Or your dreams ...good luck to you and me I know we both are still missing each other.. You remember that I told you give us some time to cold down ntil I get back to Taiwan and everything's can discuss , that's because in here I can't meet you and your mom don't allow you to see me either . That will makes me hate your mom, and I'll complain... Bt now everything's done here... We are officially break up .. And I have to face my own lifestyle without you.. I being used to it that I have you behind me when I'm need you , you always there for me .. It's 11:01am now was on the plane and my emotional are unstable and I feeling C*y because I really lost you and I'm alone now..totally alone I get used to it that I'll go back home and keep chatting with you and now I have no one To chat now, and I lost some friends too maybe it's because I seldom went out with them ..but now I have to get back to my old lifestyle travel and chit chat with my friends ...I know you always post on FB that one sentence 失去了才懂得他的好, well I know that before I left you behind this.. Hill you're good person and good girl just because you're too listening to your mom and you don't have the confidence that you can fight for your own future , and this makes us break up and this is the biggest issue of us, my mum said all about us only if we can choose what we want and do what we have to do no people can stop us, just because you too listening to your mom, yes you're right we always listen to our mom, but not everything even that you know that's a wrong decision why you stil wanna Listen? This is not a complain post , it's just a remind that you know the problem of you and mine and when you meet another guy you know what to you and I wish you good luck keys and hope you can find a good guy that being your boyfriend...
My emotion now was confusing, and I was worry abut that will this emotional will interrupt my studies , and it's a final years and it left 11 month that I think I can graduated from a master degree... Tears was keep rolling when I'm typing this... And I listening the iPod classic that you gift me thank you Hillary this is the best gift ever, I was very tired but I can't sleep here *inside the plane* one kids and baby beside me and keep crying and the kid was very annoying I just can't sleep... Diarrhea sin yesterday morning and now I was very suffering keep gong bath room with non stop since morning will now I went 10 times of toilet already I'm dehydrate and I miss my family also e specially mom and sis ... I didn't call my dad because that she's not feeling well also just let him to rest one more years I'll be back Malaysia for sure I dont think that I'm gonna stay at Taiwan for working Malaysia it's suit me more and I don't think Taiwan is the best country for mr, Malaysia is the places I born and the places I meet you ....
Few days ago I been India I was worry abut you, when you said want to break up with me and I was wondering why you make decision so fast? Like you losing your temper and control it's a shock that I feel it... In India actually I didn't really enjoy the whole trip because that I was think about our relationship will it be fix? Well end up is a big No and I have to accept the fact...
It's 11:20am now
About average 20min I have to go toilet once , my ass are on fire and I didn't use tissue paper anymore cause it's very hurt... I wish to call you when I'm arrived Taiwan and I wish I can talk to you...but everything's changed I can't c*y infront of your face it'd s bug shame to me, when I'm in India I wish I didn't broke up with You but i don't know that you want to break up again? It's because that I'm respect your decision then we only break up.. Seriously I want to say no at first but When I think about your mom I was scare , I don't know what she will do to you next and what will you be in a bad situation? I was thinking deeply these day will we get back together when I get back to taiwan? I know you're home but I can't go find you because we already break up before that we haven break up I don't understand that why your mom want to do this to you?why she want to stop you to seeing me? Don't understand am I really that bad ? And this is a big question between me! Since I don't belongs you , I might call your mom and ask about what she think and what she want! If she said something really meant I won't give her face I'll tell her that she's wrong totally wrong it's a big wrong for being a mother to teach her own kids... Seriously you're mom use be very happy now..I don't believe what she said actually !! Those message that she send to you all are ver dramatic I just can't accept it!
Sigh.. W don't have the U turn anymore the game is been lock up by you and the rules are been setting for no survive chance ... All I can do is stand up and keep moving forward and wish I can finish my education and things will get smooth and good luck
Its11:35am now I been ate three 寶濟丸 since at the air port I was waiting to go bathroom it's because lots of people Queing at the back my seat was at 7D and the toilet was at 30 roll ...kinda suffer now, gastric are not feeling well and bhead feeling dizzy some more I think I was kena food poisoning
12:40pm after a short nap And I went toilet twice again.... Totally 4 times in the plane and 5 times on air port I'm very tired and no strength for anything ... And tomorrow I have to start my work ....meeting and research , my heart is very painful now..it's a huge hole on my heart and I was trying to find sometime to fix it... I was suffering and I really think that I was god enough to being your boyfriend but I dont know that you still saying me that I still not prefect maybe that everyone are not perfect? That's why you said that?
My chest feeling painful I can't really breath , cause it's hurt and suffer.. Hillary I miss you.. I know that you will said you only cares me when I'm in Taiwan is it? Actually u know me so well since a we being together for 2 years more when I'm roll back the memories of us, my tears starting to drop.. Sis was asking me this morning am I sad? Or do you think it's unworth to leave u behind? I said I just respect your decision , am I sad? Well infront of their face I won't but inside my heart I was very hurt and sad, when u text me last night I wanna chat with you but it seems like impossible ... You know when I'm at Taiwan I got lots of time then I can talk to you anytime anywhere but when I'm in Malaysia you know im being busy all the time , and you knew it and you understand it each of my Ex non of them can take this bad habit of mine , but you you made it ..
1:00pm on the plane the kids and baby are crying together , I can't think anything more , it's like a brain freezing I don't have the appetite to eat since last night , cause food poisoning and keep going to toilet and my stomach was kinda uncomfortable because that food poisoning makes me Feels like vomit anytime ... I'm so down now
My dearest person leaves and I leave my family today and back to the position that I was and start working and studying hillary I don't think you will let us to get back together and this post are not asking you for get back together? I just want you to know that I'm still cares about you and im not s cold blood , I Know you always said me cold blood I don't care about you too...well actually I do.
1:10pm the baby keep crying for 10min and whole pone was awake by the baby , so I cr*ed just now.this morning ah chew uncle came before I went. Out it's 5am in the morning and I don't have the chance to talk to him about us, I wanna ask him that why you are so silly that tells everything's to your mom? I was wondering.... What if your mom complaining didn't let me know, will we be happy? Dad didn't ask about us, Louis came my places these few days well he try to talk to me and being my bro to make me feel ok , but now everyone are back to their own position even you..I don't know that your schoo start at when but all I know is your working at the cafe again.. Seems like you really enjoy the cafe...one more hour and I'll be touch down .. I'll takes 高鐵 to go back and transfer taxi to my places I'm sure when i get back to my places I'm gonna feel more down! And do you believe it? This time when I come back I didn't drink alcohol at all even a beer, I just drinks tea and coffee..I wish my stomach will get well and no more suffer ... And nmy wight drop now only left 59kg all because that food poisoning and I didn't workout at all keep hungry mode on and on ... Well hillary 我不捨得你的離開，但是我也很難再承受你媽的無理的壓力..I'm really confuse what wrong with your mom..
1:20pm
I got the feels that going toilet again ... Seriously it's suffer and painful my ass are bleeeding somemore maybe too much of boom..
Hill after you saw this blog call me on FaceTime , we try to talk about that ok? See that are we gong to think another solution to fix this situation even that we are not gonig to get back together ...
